On My Husband

(^heh...heh... giggity.)

Just had an AWESOME day at the Corning Museum of Glass with my hubby, but any indication of what our experience was like would need to include a description of my man and who we are together.  So to avoid this problem in the future, here's a little long-winded background... (Its my blog and I can ramble if I want to!)

Colin and I met on the day after my birthday in 2008.  My mom and Grammy were visiting me in my first apartment, and I had only been living there for about two months.  I never moved back home after my freshman year of college.  I went straight from the dorms into a little one bedroom with a hallway kitchen and a nice little patio on the back.  I still miss that place... but that's an entry for another day.

On this day in July, the three of us were just pulling in from a shopping trip at the mall to get me my very own first vacuum cleaner (still have it, that things a champ!) and the new season of Dexter when we see two bros playing Frisbee in the parking lot of my complex.  My mother insists that she introduced Colin and me, because at this point, as we were getting out of the car, she made some embarrassing  comments about joining their game, I grabbed the vacuum cleaner out of the trunk and gave the boys a little head shake and a smile trying to say "Whatt're ya gunna do?  She's my mom". We all head inside, and I think my mom made a comment about how I should be more open to new people, then I went back outside to let my dog Zoie out to pee.

I smiled and made eyes at the boys, let Zoie do her business, walked her shit to the dumpster, and then on the way back, the shorter of the two threw the Frisbee into my white Ford F-150 (later to be dubbed the Bat Truck), where I had a huge 60ish pound TV chillin' waiting to be moved to the dumpster.  I can't exactly remember how I wove my magic spell and talked the boys into hauling that TV to the trash for me... but +5 at least to charisma for me!  We stood outside talking for a little bit and did introductions.  The taller one's name was, let's say... Michael and he lived across the lot from me with his Choral major frat buddies, and this guy here in the green Guinness shirt was his buddy Colin, who lived down the road.  Oh, you go to NAU too?  That's cool, what do you study?  You play french horn? I was in the marching band!

After awhile, my neighbor (Jemma? Gemma?  Fuckin' gorgeous little piece with tattoos and daddy issues working as a pre-law intern) comes out with her two dogs and all four of us get to chatting for a good few hours.  My madre eventually felt the need to remind me that I had guests and Dexter to attend to, which, since I was a few years everyone's junior, felt like the equivalent of being told that the street lights were on and it was time to come home (which they were and it was).  Mike at least had the foresight to invite my neighbor and me to dinner the following Tuesday, and I think we all left that breezy piece of grass a little bit twitterpated.

Let me back up here and describe where I was as a young woman at this time.  The previous November I had broken up with my high school sweetheart of four years, and had immediately fallen into a 6-month rebound "relationship" with a guy I affectionately refer to as my mistake.  By my birthday I think I had been truly single for about a month and was loving the freedom of living alone and supporting myself like a real-live grown up, even if I was a little lonely with all of my friends gone for the summer.  I was fresh off my freshman year of college, and SO done with relationships.  Ready to just mess around and drink too much and enjoy my formative years.

So later that week I walked into that house looking for trouble, and loving every moment of the unknown experience.  I remember having a generally good time, meeting the other room mates, and being Wii remote buddies with Colin.  At one point he laid his hand on my leg with a gentle pressure that held all the giddy excitement of a new relationship.  The warm shivers that ran down my spine at that timid touch still resonate with me today.

HOWEVER it became pretty clear pretty quickly that nice little Colin (who btw is only an inch taller than me and thus barely meets the height requirements for this girl's ride) was as sweet as sweethearts come, and definitely  not looking for a casual hook-up, so I gravitated to the taller, more out-spoken (because he liked to hear himself speak) of the Frisbee boys.  We all exchanged numbers, and were invited back for dinner the next week.

After that, Colin disappeared to Denver for the International Horn Symposium, and I started hanging out a little more with Mike, conveniently located across the street.  He (like most guys would be) was all excited to hear about my commitment to non-relationships and my desire to mess around and have a good time.  Add to that  a couple'a beers and an excellent wing-man, and you've got a everything you need for a footloose one-nighter!  It was made unnecessarily awkward the next morning when Mike felt the need to be stand-offish in order to discourage sharing breakfast (as if I was interested... its hard for guys to understand that not all girls want their cuddles), but I left in good spirits feeling like a liberated woman of the modern age, and we were still on for dinner on Tuesday.  

Before that though, on Sunday, Colin had arrived home from his conference (at which he professes to have been thinking about his Wii remote buddy the whole time :P) and asked me to hang out with him and a buddy at the lake that was about a 15 minute drive from my place.  They said I could take my dog, so I was in.  I had a blast, still feeling proud that I was accepting the world with open arms, and when it came time for dinner we all agreed that sushi sounded amazing and Steve, the buddy, was going to go home and shower, pick up his lady, and meet back up with us after.  So we hung out at my place for a bit then headed over to the restaurant, only to find that Steve had decided not to come.  (There is still some debate in this household as to whether that tricky little move getting Colin and me to have a one-on-one dinner in a fancy sushi restaurant was planned.)  Afterwards we went to hang out at his place, and even though I had work at 6am the next morning, we stayed up until 4:30am chatting, sharing Youtube videos, and generally getting to know each other.  It was lovely and exciting and exactly the kind of thing I was hoping to avoid, so I made sure he knew my past and what I was looking for right then, and told him about what had happened with Mike just to clear the air.  I'm all about honesty and transparency, and information like that has the power to hurt if you let it.  He understood and was cool with it, but there was an obvious connection between us.  When it came time for me to go he walked me out to my truck (I think he was carrying an extra microwave he was letting me borrow), and as we said goodbye I expected him to give me a goodnight kiss ('cuz as much as I kept saying I didn't want a relationship I am and forever will be a relationship kind'a gall) and he did like an awkward jigg and I ended up brushing my lips along the back of his ear or something as we hugged goodbye.  It was adorable and awkward and probably more memorable than any peck on the cheek or lips could have been :)  I zombied through my 9 hour shift an immediately called my friend to tell her about this amazing guy I couldn't get out of my head.  

The next day was dinner, and I was excited to see Colin and have a good time, and hoped that Mike had gotten over his silliness, because I was hoping we could all still enjoy each other's company.  He hadn't... and I think that's probably why I said "fuck it" and drank so much more than the last time.  Now, I'm not saying that I took Colin back to my place because I was drunk (although I most certainly was), I'm just saying that I had let go of the inhibitions that would have kept me from getting involved with such a nice guy who was obviously interested in something more serious than a huge make-out session on the stairs outside my apartment (which. was. awesome.)  The rest of that night was kind of a blur, but I remember that we broke one of my candles and sweet, sweet Colin sat through me singing and dancing to most of the Josie and the Pussycats movie before we made our way to the bedroom.  

In the morning, Colin was all about making me breakfast so as I was in the shower the smoke alarm went off... We had burnt eggs and toast, and it was all so cute I had to pinch myself.  But after work that day, when he had called and indicated that he wanted to take me out and do it again... I had to have a hard conversation with him re-iterating that I did not want to be tied down to one person, and that I loved hanging out with him but that I wasn't ready to make a commitment.  He took it pretty hard, didn't understand, and wasn't able to just be friends knowing that I may at any time be turning on the charm with someone else.  I don't think we spoke for about three days after that, which was sad, but I understood his confusion and knew that I had sent him mixed signals.  When he finally did call me, he had turned a new leaf, decided that friends was better than nothing, and I invited myself over to watch scrubs and play guitar hero.  I still remember the giant desk chair we were sharing to look up another Youtube video when he kissed me, and I was just done. A few hours later as I cuddled up next to him getting ready to drift off to sleep, I rolled my eyes and said "Okay... I guess I'm your girlfriend," and the next morning, we made pancakes.  

That was August 1st, 2008, and on 8/1/10, I married my best friend.  Just goes to show that as soon as you stop looking for love, it finds you.  There is no better way to have someone open up to you than by allowing yourself to open up to the world.  Things have moved relatively quickly for us (our relationship only recently became the longest one of my life, a wedding, cross country move, and a kid later lol), but it never could have been any other way.  Colin is one of the kindest, most loving people I know, and his incessant optimism and passion are a daily inspiration.  If he could title this blog it would be "On Poker and Pampers: The Ponderings of a Progressive Parent" because he loves wordplay in all it's forms.  We are not without our problems (I mean really, who is?), but the journey thus far has been an absolute joy.